2021

september 17th - 12:01 AM

updated the trashfeed to have a table layout


september 14th - 12:24 AM

same as it ever was


september 12th - 11:10 PM

i found a $200 check in my drawer, and that was the best thing that happened that week. cooleeg was uneventful, mostly just orientation stuff this week. wearing a mask for roughly 4-5 hours a day is going to be gross. campus is really busy. i forgot how much i hated crowds.

i want to learn how to lucid dream, or at least remember my dreams. now that i have an actual sleep schedule it might be easier. last night i dreamed i was in some kind of community deep in the forest, living in cabins and tents. i don't remember details but there was a bear eating popcorn and it was speaking broken french, maybe its a vision of some sort


september 7th - 12:15 AM

summer break is now offically over. i go to college in person for lectures tomorrow for the first time in a long time. i managed to get into all the classes i need for this semester at the last minute. it'll be interesting to see how this year goes, i'm mostly wondering if college will stay until winter. i can only imagine how busy the staff must be.

i spent time drawing up a new mascot character thing (yes i know its basically a fursona shut up). hes a mouse pilot, i don't have much of a story for him yet. i'm trying to get better at character designs, i feel that drawing the same oc's for a long time has stagnated my drawing skills.

today i picked some of my garden corn and ate it for dinner. it was kind of dry because i let it grow for too long, but it tasted alright


august 23rd - 11:30 PM

wew


august 19th - 9:38 PM

its been quiet lately, mostly just relaxing whenever i'm not working. i'm getting worried about summer ending, theres a lot i still want to do. too bad most of the things i want to do involve friends, and my friends are all very busy these days. good friends are hard to find and harder to keep. i think one of my more reliable friends got banned from snapchat the other day, and i don't have his phone number or anything. the only other method of contact i have is through xbox so i messaged him on there, but i don't know if he'll see it. a lesson to not totally rely on one social media platform to keep in touch with people. its crazy to think how many relationships would just vanish if the internet somehow went down.

my crops are nearly finished growing, i dug up a quarter of my potatos, and got several bags of peas. the corn should be ready to pick in a week or so. i think my carrots got eaten by creatures. i might post pictures of the plants in a few days.

for my birthday i got a headphone cable for my guitar amp so now i can play loud without the fear of people hearing my awful playing. i've been trying to play everyday because thats the only way i can get better.

a few songs i'm learning:


august 5th - 4:51 PM

so i got a new job working for a landscaping company, and had my first day on tuesday. it was a tough day, a 10.5 hour shift in near 30 degree weather. the first part of the day was pretty chill until our last stop, where we spent around 5 hours mostly moving dirt and cutting hedges. unfortunately the house had a pretty steep staircase, so we had to carry wheelbarrows of dirt upstairs, which took a lot out of me. also i didn't bring enough food. i have my next shift tomorrow and its going to be a bit longer apparently, but it'll be cloudy. i would rather work longer in cool temperatures than shorter in hot temperatures.

last night i went to a jazz club with my family, and it was really neat. the place is pretty old and had a cool atmosphere. there were three guys performing (piano, bass, drums) in the first act, and they were joined by a trombone player and a trumpet player in the second act. it was fun to see live music again.

today i watched "it's such a beautiful day" by don hertzfeldt and it might be my new favourite movie. its been a long time since i saw a movie that not only made me emotional, but also changed the way i view life. i'm not really sure how to describe it but its one of the best analyses on life, memories, and existence i've ever seen. i'll be thinking about it for quite some time


august 1st - 9:34 PM

this is my first journal update since turning 20. i don't feel much different. turning 19 was a lot cooler because thats the age you can do adult things like drinking and gambling (i don't do much of either). honestly i'm pretty indifferent about being 20, i feel like i missed out on a lot of "teenager" stuff and i'll never be able to get those years back. but because the bar is pretty low, i'm thinking the 20s are going to be better. like most people i'm uncertain of the future.


july 11th - 11:27 PM

things i did today


june 23rd - 4:10 PM

pretty much done school, now i have even more time to waste


june 20th - 6:57 PM

on friday i went camping and it was a nice getaway. we basically just hung around the lake and had a campfire. the tent was kind of scuffed but we figured it out eventually. swimming was nice, the water was warm, but it also made me realize that i'm kind of out of shape. i'll probably be using my pool more this summer


june 18th - 2:11 AM

update time: i updated the cool links section a bit so it looks less awful.

things have happened in the real world. the things i planted a few weeks ago are coming up pretty good, the peas are a few inches tall now. i've been playing more guitar than usual this week. it feels like i haven't made much improvement in months and i want to change that. been focusing more on exercises than learning full songs. i don't remember if i mentioned it, but i've been working on another website for my college class. we're making a record store called "radical records", and i'd say its pretty rad. we pretty much have to put all of our skills we've learned so far into it, which makes for a good learning experience.

my family went to the movie theatre for the first time in a year. i didn't because i wasn't interested in the movie, and i was working on stuff. but its nice that things seem to be opening up again. it doesn't feel like the varus has affected my life significantly, its more just an annoyance at this point. this weekend i'm going camping with some friends for the first time in years. should be fun


may 26th - 3:01 AM

its been nearly a month since i last posted here, and not a lot has happened. i've been doing some gardening as a way to get outside more. so far i've planted peas, potatos, and corn. and some carrots at my nanas place. its been getting a lot nicer out, and it doesn't get dark until around 9. i hung out with some of my friends i hadn't seen in a while, but not for as long as i wanted.

the moon is really bright right now. i was considering driving somewhere and maybe practicing some skateboarding, but i'm too tired at the moment.

i've been playing a lot more tf2 lately. the bot problem sucks, but the game is still as fun as ever. maybe i get lucky, but i don't get into many servers with bots. too bad i can't convince many of my friends to play. on the topic of gaming, i guess e3 is happening soon. looking foward to cringing at it. the gaming industry is in such a bad state, so i doubt i'll be interested in whatevers annouced. most triple a games that come out these days are either boring, unfinished or borderline clones of already existing games.

today i updated the art section with a different layout, but thats the only major update i've done since the last update. still don't feel too good with my drawings, i want to draw something more interesting than "character standing or sitting around" but good, original ideas are hard to come up with, let alone drawing them. developing a cool artstyle is also a challenge. someday i want to draw/write legit comics, but i need to learn to draw before that.

it's getting late so i'm going to write more tomorrow.


april 29th - 11:04 PM

i did a lot of work on this site today, especially the about section which has a more compact layout now. i have to optimize it for phones at some point. i also drove into the city for the first time in like half a year and it wasn't as scary is i thought it would be


april 29th - 5:49 PM

college is pretty much done for the term, but i've got another class starting next week. these last few weeks have left my mental state probably the worst its been in a long time. this summer i'm going to try and learn as much as i can on my own.


april 20th - 7:01 PM

its finals week, so i'm busy and tired. first exam went alright, but todays might have failed me the course. i have another tomorrow, and i don't know how thats going to go. i got a bit of time to work on the website a bit, changing a few assets and working on the "cool links" section. when exams are over, i'm going to try and reformat the site a bit. thinking of puting the menu bar on the left side of the screen and drawing up some assets. the current setup i have right now is kinda boring, and i mostly set it up that way because its easier to make it look good on mobile.


april 1st - 5:10 PM

i added the trashzone, where the trash goes


march 30th - 9:33 PM

gonna write down all my memories so i don't forget


march 30th, 2021 - 3:20 PM

youtube removing dislikes is probably one of the worst things they've done in a while, which is saying something. they say they're just "testing a new feature" while removing one of the most important features of the website. without the dislikes, its going much harder to tell if a video is worth watching or if a video is bad or even a scam. youtube always claims that they bring these changes because of "creator feedback", but i have yet to see a single creator support this. its been pretty obvious that youtube has prioritized corporations and the mainstream media over individual creators for a while, and this update is just another way to protect these corporations

its hard to believe that youtube used to have "broadcast yourself" as a slogan. as time goes on, youtube becomes less "broadcast yourself" and more "broadcast television". youtube is trying to become like cable tv, when one of the best things about the site was that it was an alternative to cable tv. it was a website where literally any individual could make content and becoming successful was a realistic goal. now that youtube only promotes news channels, late night talk shows, and corporate media, the chances of even being seen on youtube have only gotten worse. the only content that makes it on youtube these days is corporate, cookie-cutter, dumbed-down, sterilized videos that are produced solely to make as much ad revenue as possible

creative, genuine youtube content still exists, but its so overshadowed by garbage, disposable content that youtube promotes that finding it is harder than ever. the worst thing about it is that there's no alternative to youtube. sites like vimeo and dailymotion exist but literally who uses that. google essentially has a monopoly on online video hosting, so they're basically free to screw over creators and users however they want


march 30th, 2021 - 1:07 AM

eating glowsticks


march 29th, 2021 - 8:13 PM

i was gonna do some cool stuff with javascript but then i realized i still suck at that, but i did a bit of work on the music section today


march 27th, 2021 - 11:41 PM

college is wrecking me as usual. i've got a test on monday that i'm not ready for, but hopefully after i'll be able to breathe a bit. today i planted some pea plants, because i want to learn to garden. it'll be a good skill to have when civilization collapses. this year i'll be growing peas, carrots, potatoes, and corn. i played and finished a game called "omori" about a week ago, the first single-player game i've played in a long time. the art style is great, the music slaps, and the story is an emotional rollercoaster. it's the second (maybe third) game to make me cry, even though i got the "good" ending.


march 11th, 2021 - 2:24 AM

wow its been a while since the last update. its been pretty busy. i had so much to do last week, but its slowed down a bit. not much happening now except for school. i've been looking into what's involved in the electrical trade. the more i sit at this computer, the more i realize that i might not want to do this as a job. most of my hobbies involve a computer already, and staring at a screen for at least 8 hours a day on top of that doesn't sound too appealing. i'm not giving up on this program though, it'll be good to finish it and maybe get some contacts out of it. school might be reopening in september, which honestly at this point i'd rather stay remote. i dread having to drive in morning traffic again.

i'm also going to have to start looking for a job for the summer. all i want is time to do want i really want to do. i've been trying to practice drums a bit every day, along with guitar. i get pretty discouraged with guitar. its been nearly a year since i picked it up, and i feel like should be a lot more competent. going days at a time without playing definitely doesn't help. i started playing a game called omori a couple days ago. the first single player game i've played in a long time. i'm only like 4 hours in and its really cool so far (and kind of depressing).


february 27th, 2021 - 1:04 AM

things be expensive


february 26th, 2021 - 11:52 PM

had my first midterm today which could have gone better, but i still passed and thats what matters. my brain was kinda fried after that, so i didn't do much today. i'm working on redesigning my mascot (totally not a fursona), because his design is pretty boring.


february 25th, 2021 - 2:02 AM

why do humans have to sleep 8 hours a day to function, its such a waste of time. i like sleeping but if i had another 8 hours in a day i would be literally unstoppable


february 25th, 2021 - 1:55 AM

soon i'll do some proper write-ups of topics that i have thoughts on, when i have time


february 25th, 2021 - 1:12 AM

lots to say with no way to say it


february 25th, 2021 - 12:00 AM

midterms are coming up, and i don't know if i'm ready. the material shouldn't be too hard, but the time limits are really short. i get that its to prevent people from spending too much time looking up stuff, but its still extremely short given the amount of questions we're getting. the next week is probably gonna suck. i did a bit more art recently, and i like how it turned out. i want to figure out and stick to a consistent style at some point. learning how to draw things that aren't just animal people is also on my to-do list. speaking of art, i need to add some features to the art section, and to actually make that music section thats been empty since i made this site


february 22nd, 2021 - 9:04 PM

guess i'm never seeing daft punk live


february 21st, 2021 - 1:30 AM

making music is something i want to do, but i've got no idea where to start. i don't even know what kind of music i'd want to do. probably some form of punk or experimental rock. one of the biggest challenges would be making my own unique sound. i don't want to make stuff that sounds like everything else, but its hard when it seems like everythings been done before. also i still kind of suck on guitar, and i freeze whenever i try to play for anyone. and if i did try to write lyrics i don't know what i'd write about. with practice, obviously i could get good but its hard with school taking all my time.


february 21st, 2021 - 1:18 AM

someday i'll eat so many salt and vinegar chips that i'll straight up die


february 20th, 2021 - 11:37 PM

i deleted basically all my unnecessary stuff off my phone, including most my social media apps. i kept snapchat and instagram only because i have a couple chats on there that i can't access on the computer. sometimes i consider selling my current phone and getting a flip phone instead, but i'm too used to the luxuries that the newest phones have (maps, car bluetooth, touchscreens).


february 19th, 2021 - 6:06 PM

its amazing how much time i waste


february 17th, 2021 - 11:06 PM

today i changed my car tire because it went flat for some reason. kind of annoying, but a good learning experience. yesterday i hung out with my friends, went to mcdonalds, and got high. the highlight of my break so far. my sleep schedule is pretty messed, and i've been too tired to do much. not looking forward to going back. feeling: alright


february 16th, 2021

i was going to make pancakes today but i'm out of oil. feeling: pain


february 13th, 2021

worked on college work for like 15 hours yesterday. i finished pretty much everything except for a javascript assignment, which hopefully isn't worth too much. it snowed a few centimeters overnight, which is nice. i like snow, except when i have to drive in it. i've been playing a bit more tf2 lately, and absolutely crushing people. too bad basically none of my friends play tf2. now that i have time, i'm going to work more on this site, its still pretty empty. right now i'm going to walk in the snow. feeling: pretty good


february 11th, 2021

one more day until freedom, for a week. i've got a lot due tomorrow, and i don't know if i'll finish it all. considering staying up all night. its supposed to snow tomorrow so maybe the power will go out and i'll get some extra time.


february 1st, 2021

holy crap its february already. reading break is almost here, which is cool. not much happening right now, just continuing to exist. i got maybe 4 hours of sleep last night, and i dreamt something really weird, but i forgot what it was.


january 30th, 2021

updated the art section to be more responsive. also did a bit of optimizing for phone screens. idk if its just me, but css on this site takes forever to update.

i learned about the marquee tag today

january 28th, 2021

bought a skateboard like a week ago and it arrived today. i've maybe ridden a skateboard maybe twice in my life so i don't know what i'm doing. i'll just be practicing in my garage for now because i don't want to publicly embarrass myself. i was planning on getting a lot of work done today, but i was pretty distracted by the whole gamestop/dogecoin thing. nice to see wall street getting rekt.


january 22nd, 2021

did a bit more work here today. hopefully i'll get some free time this weekend. i'm going to the corner store and getting snacks rn


january 20th, 2021

college is a bit busy, so working on this website is going pretty slow. its still pretty barebones, but progress has been made. more coming soon


january 15th, 2021

today i began making this website. this is the first "update", but i don't know if i'll keep it up. i have a lot of ideas i want to implement into this thing, but i'll have to spend more time learning how. also i'm getting busy with college, which should take priority.